How to Cope with Infertility — What Helps When You Feel Like Everything’s Falling Apart

Infertility can feel like a silent heartbreak. Month after month of hoping, waiting, testing, and disappointment can take a toll—not just physically, but emotionally and mentally, too.

And while well-meaning advice like “just relax” or “try not to stress” may come your way, the reality is: coping with infertility is hard. You’re not broken for struggling. And you’re not alone.

Here’s how to gently support yourself when infertility feels all-consuming—and where to turn for real, steady support.

1. Give Yourself Permission to Feel Everything

Anger. Grief. Jealousy. Exhaustion. Hope. Shame. Hope again.

Infertility is a rollercoaster, and your feelings are valid—every messy, conflicting one of them. You don’t have to be “positive” all the time. Give yourself space to feel without judgment.

Try journaling, talking it out with someone safe, or even saying things out loud. Bottling it up doesn’t protect you—it just isolates you.

2. Set Boundaries (and Stick to Them)

Protecting your energy is part of healing. It’s okay to:

• Skip the baby shower

• Say “I’d rather not talk about that right now”

• Mute or unfollow people on social media who trigger you

• Delay or redirect conversations with family or friends

You don’t owe anyone an explanation for your boundaries. You owe yourself peace.

3. Find a Fertility-Safe Support System

Not everyone gets what you’re going through—and that’s okay. But you do deserve people who do. Whether it’s a friend who listens without fixing, a fertility therapist, or an online support group, find people who can hold space for your experience.

At fertie, we believe community is everything. That’s why we offer not just information, but connection.

4. Focus on What You Can Control

You can’t always control the outcome—but you can take care of yourself through it.

• Nourish your body with foods that support hormone balance

• Sleep and rest, even if your mind is racing

• Move gently—walks, yoga, or any activity that brings you back to yourself

• Ask your doctor clear questions so you feel informed, not overwhelmed

And if it feels empowering, learn more about your body. Understanding your cycle, hormones, and options can bring clarity in the chaos.

5. Give Yourself Breaks

You’re allowed to take a cycle off. To take a vacation. To have a day (or week) where you don’t track anything or think about “the plan.”

Infertility doesn’t get to rule your life. Stepping back for a breath doesn’t mean giving up—it means protecting your mental health.

Final Thoughts

Coping with infertility isn’t just about surviving—it’s about creating space to still feel joy, connection, and hope. You are not your diagnosis. You are whole, worthy, and strong—even on the days it doesn’t feel that way.

👉 Inside our Fertility 101 course, we offer tools for emotional support, community spaces, and expert-led insights—so you never have to do this alone.

You deserve support that sees you as a person, not just a patient. We’re here for you, every step of the way.

FAQ

Is it normal to feel depressed during infertility?
Yes. Infertility is a major life stressor. Consider talking to a therapist who understands reproductive health.

How can I stay hopeful without getting crushed?
It's okay to hope and protect your heart. Focus on small steps, and celebrate moments of peace—not just outcomes.

What if my partner copes differently than I do?
That’s common. Open, honest conversations can help bridge the gap. Consider couples counseling if needed.

You don’t have to figure this alone

Inside fertie, you’ll get:

• Expert-led courses to make informed decisions

• Private support from women on the same path

• Exclusive partner clinic perks & discounts

Disclaimer: Prices and treatment protocols vary by clinic and individual. Always consult with your fertility specialist for accurate, up-to-date pricing and guidance tailored to your situation.